12/17/12: Rockets 109 - Knicks 96

Well that was like a horrible remake of an originally horrible movie. I can't think of a creative one to cite but this was just like that. The Rockets are a horrible match-up for any team with older guards. They did it to the Spurs the other night, making their guys chase around a 23 year old shooting guard and a 24 year old point guard. The Knicks guards struggled to keep up and the game got out of hand early. I'm okay with it in a weird way - I feel like that is just a bad game for the Knicks and the season series is now officially over.

This is the third game this year I have found myself trembling and involuntarily murmuring Iman Shumpert's name to no one in particular (other two were the previous Rockets game and Mavs in Dallas). That just would've been a great game to have that flat-topped, on-ball specimen. I hope he is doing all of his leg exercises.

Tracy Morgan "tookover" the Knicks official Twitter account. And I assume by tookover that means they let Tracy Morgan sit in a room with a computer plugged in because there is no way he had uncontrolled access to anything.  

Waka Flocka Copeland had a nice game. Looked like he got beat a few more times than you'd like to see but he could end up being a nice player.

JR kept the Knicks competitive at the beginning of the game. It was not enough and for that I am sorry. 

Oh well. Just a bad game for the Knicks. The Thunder, Grizzlies and Rockets all seem to be just horrible match-ups. On to the next one. We get my favorite team the Nets on Wednesday!

Get well soon Melo! Get well soon Iman! Get well soon Sheed! Get well soon Marcus! Good luck in the D-League today Amare!

12/13/12: Knicks 116 - Lakes 107

So the Knicks beat a 9-13 team by 9 points and I’m supposed to be all giddy? Haha just kidding – that was fucking awesome. It started as a blowout, then stopped being a blowout but the Knicks hung tough, hit some shots, got some rebounds and came out with a victory. Now 9-0 at home for the year.

Melo was absolutely incredible. He had 22 first quarter points as the Knicks built up a 26 point lead. I’ve always wondered if Mike D’Antoni is more of a proponent of not playing defense or if he is just indifferent to playing defense. The Lakers’ work on pick-and-rolls made me believe the former. I used "He's heating up", "He's on fire" and "Boomshakalaka!" at separate times in the first quarter.

Melo was incredible until Dwight Howard tried to murder him. There are some people who consistently seek new ways to be unlikable and then there is Dwight Howard. I don’t want to compare him to Casey Anthony or Conrad Murray or Kim Kardashian or someone like that. But he’s not very likable. Melo is listed as day-to-day. Seems the Knicks could get by without him vs. the Cavs on Saturday.

Tyson Chandler really won the game in the last two minutes with his tip-outs. He was credited with 4 rebounds for the game, which is ridiculous. I think he had 4 tip-outs in the final 90 seconds. But regardless he kept Dwight Howard in check and played good help defense.

Jason Kidd has another casual Jason Kidd-like game. 5 points, 9 rebounds, 5 assists, 2 steals. I love that guy.

The Knicks only had 6 turnovers all game. For those that don’t know – the Knicks coaches have to run a lap for every turnover less than 13 the team has. Woodson is going to need to get his Shaft suits taken in pretty soon.

Speaking of getting suits taken in – the Knicks have to have the softest bodied team in the history of the NBA. The Celtics team a few years back could compete with that but Kurt Thomas, Rasheed, Kidd, Felton, Melo, Novak…

Also the Knicks were 12-25 (48%) from downtown. At some point turnovers and three pointers will revert from historic levels but it’s phenomenal right now.

Earl has played two great games in a row. Novak was hot again from downtown (4-5).  

And that’s it. The Knicks beat a sloppy Lakers team. It was a blowout but then it was not. Great win all around.

Get well soon Melo! Get well soon Iman! Get well soon Marcus! Please be the 6^th man Amare!

12/11/12: Knicks 100 - Nets 97

I have consistently refused to acknowledge that this is a rivalry. You cannot artificially create a rival just because one team had apathetic fans in a broken down arena in the swamp of New Jersey. But man these last two games have felt like there was a little something extra. The Nets fans were flat for the most part (and Knicks fans took over on a few occasions) but the players were going prettttty, prettttty hard at one another throughout.

I felt that the only team that could give the Knicks real trouble, due to their post presence, was the Grizzlies (and the Lakers if they were still alive) but the Nets have really had the Knicks’ number in the paint. Granted, the Knicks were super sloppy with their rotations in both games and played fairly lackadaisically but still. Blatche and Evans really had their way down-low, causing switches and creating mismatches that led to very easy baskets. If Deron Williams or Jerry Stackhouse or Joe Johnson hit anything from the outside that game could have been ugly. Well I guess it was very ugly but the score could have been ugly.

The Knicks battled back from down 16 in the first quarter to draw even to let the lead get back to double digits to then come back and win. And for Melo, Kidd and Earl I am thankful. Melo started slow and then kicked into a frenetic MVP pace. He finished with 45 on 15-24 shooting (5-7 from 3 and 10-11 from FT) and willed the team through stretches. But that would have been for naught had Kidd not been as beautiful and bald and white mocha colored as he was. I hate that we needed Kidd to play 37 minutes to win a game on December 11^th but we did and I’ll get over it. Kidd finished with 18 (all from 3) including an icy-smooth peppermint, shaken game winner that caused me to irrationally make noises that I imagine a tapir to make. Lord we need Iman back to take some minutes away from him. And Earl Meets World battled through painful back spasms to add 16 of his own.

I think I saw Sheed hit two timely 3s but that was it. No other Knicks played. It was 3 on 5. And that was enough.

The @nyknicks twitter account was taken over by Vinny from the Jersey Shore. I cringed when I heard it and then thoroughly enjoyed his tweets throughout the game. He signed each with the hashtag #VinnyTakeOver, which may catch on as the new, progressive “Ball Don’t Lie”

I consistently forget how silly Avery Johnson sounds when speaking.

The Knicks whining finally paid off, getting a critical Blatche tip-in call reversed and wiped off.

I know I said no other Knicks played but I should acknowledge Felton had the weirdest play in the history of plays when he let the ball slip out and then geyser straight up in the air. It was weird and thankfully didn’t matter.

Bill Kennedy is too bad and Dick Bavetta is too old to be reffing basketball games. That got out of hand a few times, namely when Gerald Wallace torpedoed into JR Smith. I’m just asking for safety out there. After the torpedo, the Knicks decided to keep playing 4-4 then Smith gets back up and it’s 5 on 4 then Melo just wipes himself down and hits a critical shot.

The Knicks stole that one and now are on a tremendous homestretch led by Mikey D’s return on Thursday night. What a win! What a steal! What a night! Man that was fun. It's great to play like dogshit on occasion and still win. Onward and upward.

Get well soon Iman! Get well soon Marcus! [xxxxx] Amare!

12/9/12: Knicks 112 - Nuggets 106

Well arriving at 4 AM from Chicago (due to weather delays) for a Sunday night game would scream “THIS IS GOING TO BE A LET DOWN GAME.” God forbid this information be disclosed to me with enough time to wager on the first quarter line. But I digress. I was able to attend my second game of the season and you could tell that the team didn’t have their legs underneath them. The Knicks came out flat in the first quarter then battled back in the second then let the third slip away then went on a great run in the fourth to put the game on bottle service.

I politely passed on doing a rundown on the Chicago game because (1) My body felt awful (2) I would probably say mean things about Raymond Felton after I had such positive (platonic) thoughts about him following the Miami game. JR, rightfully, gets a very hard time for being the streakiest player in the history of all players but Raymond has been on an unusual clip as well. He followed up his Chicago stinker with another bizarre performance. It was a quieter 4-15 than the 9-30 Saturday performance but more consistency would be really appreciated. I also expected him to be a little more fired up playing the Nuggets for the first time as a Knick since that whole trade thing we collectively have ignored. But oh well.

Jason Kidd is awesome at getting someone in the air and then jumping into them to draw the foul. This has to be one of the most frustrating things to ever defend. You would think Jason would find a way to not have someone land on his head every time he does this though. I mean if he’s not careful his head is going to be swollen to the size of his son’s (he also tested out this at halftime http://knickerblogger.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/Screen-Shot-2012-12-09-at-9.05.06-PM.png). He and Novak both sparked the run (with Melo out in foul trouble) in the fourth.

The crowd broke out into a lovely “Ball Don’t Lie” chant following a technical called on Carmleo. Carmelo now has the second most technicals in the NBA at 6, and it would be nice if he stopped doing this as much. I love so many things about this Knicks team but they are getting a little too petulant in their reactions to fouls. JR Smith does a pouting, “are you not entertained?” lap around half-court every time he gets called for a single thing. Melo really hasn’t gotten a call since the D’Antoni administration. I want to lecture them and tell them to grow up but I’m not sure when I would be afforded this opportunity.

Tyson is now shooting .709 from the field. The next closest is Serge Ibaka at .592. He had some great putbacks and alley-oops and was one of the few players who chose to rebound. Playing Carmelo at the 4 means that the Knicks are just going to give up some rebounding but Tyson did a great job on the glass again (following 18 on Saturday) pulling in 12 total and 6 offensive. JR again had an erratic shooting night but his rebounding has been such a pleasant addition this year. He pulled down 9 important boards and had 15 quiet points. I know he was especially upset about the Saturday night plane delays forcing him to cancel his table at GunBar on Gansevoort.

Corey Brewer continues to be a good basketball player that Mike D’Antoni decided to let go in exchange for shaving cream.

That’s a scrappy, albeit ugly, win for the Knickers. A day of rest today, followed by a game against that incredibly unlikable Brooklyn team. Then a home stretch of games leading up to the Christmas Day showdown with ole Mikey D and his band of unmerry Lakers.

Get well soon Iman! Get well soon Rasheed! Get well soon Marcus! Continue to work on authoring self-promoting children’s books Amare!

12/6/12: Knicks 112 - Heat 92

I got my Knickaz in Miami and they going Gorillaz. Huh?

What a game, what a game. I walked into a bar last night, after 20 minutes on the subway, only to be informed by the television that my beloved Melo would be sitting out with 6 sTitches in his finger. I promptly took a large sip of my beverage, let out a “hsugh” type noise and said to no one in particular “well here we go.” And here we go we did. Raymond and Tyson each picked up the other 10 players by their waists, spun them a bit, and fireman carried them on their backs. Everyone got in on the action from the Knicks side and that was just great. The Knicks dared anyone with a name other than LeBron to beat them and they all politely declined. And that was lovely.

Raymond, Raymond, Raymond. In perhaps his best game as a pro, Raymond was slicing and dicing and serving up meals for all the other Knicks players. He shot a preposterous 6-10 from 3 and finished the game with 7 assists but those numbers beguile his impact on the game. He was in complete control, forcing Miami to switch on pick and rolls and calling his own number to get to the paint. Letting Lin go seemed spiteful and shortsighted but I think I forgot what an in-shape Ray Felton could do. His natural inclination will always be to be overweight so let’s collectively agree to take cheap shots about his weight to really build up insecurities. Cool?

The Knicks had 8 guys with 7+ points and Jason Kidd was a preposterous +31 for the game. The Knicks also only had 7 turnovers (more running for the Coaches!) and the bench had 57 points and only one turnover.

I feel like Steve Novak and Mike Miller have been destined to square off against one another for the “White, Small Forward, 3-pt Shooter Title” for some time now. You have the older, white-trashier, tattoo-covered former hotshot against the younger Midwestern upstart. I wish Charlie Sheen and Ashton Kutcher had the opportunity to do this for the role in Two and a Half Men. I’m not sure how that would have sorted itself on TV though.

Brewer played 27 minutes and scored 0 points. Which is really hard to believe but he also played very solid on-ball defense against LeBron and helped out all over.

“@ZachLow_NBA: Miami was -31 in 29 minutes LeBron and Wade played together, per NBA.com. Meaningless in long run, but jaw-dropping for one night.”

There was a perplexing halftime bit that featured Kenny Smith in front of some video screen that was shaped in a bit of a half-circle, cathedral-type deal. Kenny was in a suit and wearing Jerry Seinfeld sneakers. TNT should harness their powers for good.

Carmelo’s suit on the sidelines was ridiculous. If you missed it, don’t search for it. Just be happy that you missed the suit equivalent of a snuff video. Also I’m not sure when buttoning a shirt all the way to the top of the neck became a look but it’s a really bad one.

So in conclusion - I'm not even really sure what happened. The Knicks moved the ball well, played solid defense and capitalized on the given opportunities. It seems that people are really taking notice of this team and I love so much about. On to the next one at Chicago tomorrow night!

Get well soon Carmelo! Get well son Iman! Get well soon Marcus! 

12/5/12: Knicks 100 - CATS 98

Wow. So that was a basketball game played between two basketball teams. The Knicks played a-w-f-u-l for most of the game. There were obviously a few exceptions (to be discussed) but man was that ugly. It’s really hard to say that they needed that game because it took place on December 5th against a 7-9 team but it’s great to get the first win of a four games in five nights stretch.

Let us start with the namesake of this little website. Earl Smith Jr. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I feel like having JR Smith on your team is like dating Rihanna. Yes there is a chance they murder you in your sleep (or like Left Eye Lopes/Andre Rison your house), but holy cow is it fun when it is right. And tonight it was so wrong until the final five seconds. Going into that last shot JR was 5-15 from the field and 1-9 from 3 (after it he was 6-16 and 1-9 from 3). But he stole the ball and then drank water during a timeout and then took an irrational drive and then stepped back and then iced the game and then salsa’d like Victor Cruz to the dismay of the Bobcats fans (an aside – JR and Victor grew up playing AAU basketball together. The team’s name was Playaz). JR said he maintains confidence in shooting on off-nights from his teammates' encouragement. Someone on Twitter pointed it out but teammates definitely equals voices in head (choices in bed). I <3 u JR.

Melo (and Chandler) kept the Knicks in it to start. He had 20 first half points. He bullied his way into the lane, took good jumpers, took bad jumpers and made nearly all jumpers. Then in the second half the Bobcats decided to blitz Melo every time he touched the ball. Melo politely declined these 4-somes but the Others couldn’t hit their shots. Oh well. 41 threes is a lot to take. Sounds like it’s TBD if he will be good to go tonight or not. 6 stitches (I said sTitches Carmelo!).

Tyson Chandler played awesome. He had 8 points, 9 boards on 4-4 shooting in the first quarter. If you pro-rate that it is 32 points and 36 rebounds. He finished with 18 points, 17 boards on 8-10 shooting. Despite that effort, the Knicks were outrebounded by 14. That continues to be something.

Woodson did that thing again where Kurt Thomas starts the game and then plays 5 minutes. This will now be known as “All the Spurs Had to do to Save Themselves 250 Thousand American Dollars.” It’s like college senior night every night for Kurt.

Great to have Jason Kidd back. The offense just functions better when he’s out there. And I’m glad his head healed a bit while he was out. It’s really not hard to sell me on a bandaid head.

The Knicks continue to struggle defending guards. Kemba, Ben Gordon and Gerald Henderson all beat the Knicks like something politically incorrect to compare a beating to.

The Bobcats did a look-alike thing during a timeout and compared Chris Copeland to Brittney Griner. I bet he didn’t appreciate that.

The Bobcats jerseys now just say CATS across the front. The good news is MJ said he will reclaim the Hornets if New Orleans actually goes with the Pelicans as their new name. MJ and Cam Newton also watched the game in a box together.

That’s all I got. Great, gutsy win that previous Knicks teams don’t pull out. It was not pretty but otheydidit. Big one down in Miami tonight. I bet they mad.

Get well soon Melo! Get well soon Iman! Get well soon Marcus! [redacted] Amare!

12/2/12: Knicks 106 - Suns 99

Well nice win. The Knicks are now 8-0 at home this season and the Garden crowds have been great. The Knicks had the Suns blown out but let them hang around a little bit more than you'd like to see.

But obviously the funniest and best and most awesome part of the game was Rasheed Wallace managing to get two technical fouls after playing one game minute. 

Let us break down this down.

3 second mark - Rasheed face swipes Scola. Kind of like a big brother move. Whatever. Rasheed got beat and was pissed about it. Rasheed receives technical. Hilarity ensues.

6 second mark - Raymond Felton overreacts like he was personally harmed in some way. Rasheed looks very confused (stoned).

19 second mark - Gortat reacts exactly like I would, giggling to himself, unsure of what is going on but just happy to be there.

19 second to 37 second mark - Rasheed paces around thinking about cotton candy, followed by his personal consigliere, Raymond.

38 second mark - Dragic misses the technical free throw. Rasheed lets out an emphatic version of his signature "Ball don't lie."

40 second mark - Felton chuckles to himself, presumably at the volume of the "BDL." Then throws up his hands in a "I give up" manner after learning Rasheed has received a second technical and is tossed. 

42 second mark - Rasheed looks like he is trying to angrily divide by 13. 

48 second mark - Rasheed releases a second "BDL" into the world. Novak tries to speak to Rasheed for the first time ever. Rasheed declines his attempt at a conversation.

60 second mark - Rasheed appears to call the ref a "ducking Zagat," but I may have misheard him.

Just good stuff all around there

Raymond Felton played probably his best game as a Knick (redux). 23 points, 7 assists, 0 turnovers. I like this version more than the gambling against the Knicks version. He also messed his hand up pretty badly in the fourth and will need an MRI. Nice to have the next game on Wednesday, giving him and Jason some time.

Luis Scola and Pablo Prigs had a nice interaction after the game. Luis has clearly been in the league for way longer but you could tell Pablo was the cooler one in the relationship. I wonder if it has anything to do with Luis Scola looking like Russell Brand. 

Kurt Thomas appears genuinely perplexed every time when informed that he is not allowed to tackle other players while going for rebounds. 

It's really on me for thinking that JR would have all the alcohol out of his system by noon on a Sunday morning. I just really didn't expect him to be drinking Ciroc during the game. He was 1-11. Thankfully it didn't matter.  

Chris Copeland actually played well with Rasheed out and Camby sitting with a sore foot. I take back some of the snarky things I said about Cope. He still does look like a lighter Waka Flocka Flame, though.

Nice to get the win. Bobcats on Wednesday then the Heat (!!) on Thursday.

Get well soon Raymond! Feel better Marcus! Get well soon Jason! Get well soon Iman! _____ Amare!